The Power of Vulnerability

Last year was a difficult year for me. I had pain in my leg and could hardly walk, let alone cycle or drive. I walked with a stick. In November, I had hip surgery, so now I have a new hip and I'm doing well again.

Why am I telling you this? Because I learned a lot last year. I learned what it means to be vulnerable. How does being vulnerable affect you? That year, I had to accept that I could no longer do everything. It was a year in which I could no longer do the things I love to do. My holiday with the bird club had to be cancelled, and I had to learn to accept help.

Many people offered to help me, for which I am grateful. But I found it difficult to accept and acknowledge that I could no longer do everything myself. My sisters took care of my household. Even after the operation, I was not immediately able to do everything myself again and had to go into a nursing home.

Why was it so difficult for me to recognise that I needed help? Why did I want to appear so strong? For whom? Was it for the people around me? When my husband died ten years ago, people said, “You are a strong woman. You will manage.” Did I want to live up to that?

During this time, I found a Bible passage that helped me.  Paul had a thorn in his flesh which he prayed would be taken away, but it was not. Many people prayed for my healing, but I still had to have surgery.

What did Jesus do when He was in deep distress? He called upon His Father on the Mount of Olives. Jesus, in His deepest need and trial, prayed, “Take this cup away from Me.” That was Jesus, who knew beforehand why He had come to earth.

At Easter, we remember His suffering and death for us. In the time before Jesus ascended to heaven, He appeared to the disciples and the women around Him. And Jesus also reveals Himself to us. We can recognise Him when He softly calls our name, or when the bread is broken during the Lord's Supper, which we do in remembrance of Him. We remember what Jesus said to His disciples. `And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me” (Luke 22:19).

We can feel vulnerable when we are completely honest. We sometimes become afraid of what others will think. Yet being vulnerable is a strength! Vulnerability is a must in order to have sincere and intimate relationships. Every valuable relationship, such as a marriage or a good friendship, requires us to dare to be vulnerable. The layers of self-protection, the shields behind which we hide, must be broken down so that we can show our true selves. When we do that, we place ourselves in a position to receive the abundance our heart’s desire.