In the Waiting
by Bayo Earl
What do you associate with the word ‘wait’? Does It feel maybe cold and uncertain, or lonely? Maybe it makes you feel as if God is leaving you hanging or withholding something from you. I am currently reading a book about waiting on God, and it suddenly hit me that I have a negative view of waiting on God, or waiting for something in general.
But as I am making my way through this book, I’m realising that this isn’t how it should be. Each devotion focusses on why we should take courage in the wait, and God’s heart for us in the waiting. He works in the waiting. lnstead of it being a lonely and bleak time, because of who God is, we can really take hold of Him and let Him do His work. We can do this because He is good, because He is kind, because He is patient and strong, even when we are not.
This doesn’t mean that it doesn’t feel lonely and bleak at times, or that we don’t worry about whether we are doing something wrong. But even in that, Jesus is kind and patient. He understands how we feel, and He is big enough for that. As long as our hearts stay open to Him, and we keep trusting, He will lead us through and meet us in it.
I had been praying about something specific for a few months. Although nothing was happening, I felt that God was asking me to wait. I asked the Lord if it was OK for me to keep praying about it, or if I just needed to stop and move on.
He reminded me of the story of Hannah in the Old Testament, and how she was desperate to have a child and was waiting and praying for this. She said, “I was pouring out my soul to the Lord”, when praying about it at the temple (1 Samuel 1:15). She did not hold back. She didn’t grit her teeth and try to be stronger. She just poured it out to the Lord, let Him see her heart and asked for what she wanted. Because she loved the Lord and wanted to honour Him, it was safe for her to just pour her heart out and be real.
It’s the same for us. When Jesus is Lord of our lives, and we want Him to truly have His way in our lives, it is safe for us to be real. He sees our heart and it matters to Him. When we let Him into the reality of what we are feeling and what we long for, it is precious to Him. It’s a way of surrender to say, “Lord this is my heart, and this is what I am waiting for, but I will still trust You”.
The situation I had been praying about didn’t turn out the way I had hoped it would, but I am so glad it didn’t. God was protecting me, although I didn’t see it at the time. He showed me it had been OK for me to ask for what I was hoping for and pour my heart out to Him. He is so kind and gentle. He validated how I felt and wanted me to tell Him and to tell Him as many times as I needed to. I now understand why He told me so clearly to wait, and I am so grateful He did.
Let Him show you something new in the waiting. Take courage. Jesus has a plan, and the Holy Spirit is in you. You are not alone.
Bayo Earl Bayo is on team at Ellel Grange after originally joining Ellel through the gap year programme UNDIVIDED. She loves to be creative – particularly through textiles – has a lot of plants, inside and outside, and is definitely an outdoors person.
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