I have attended wonderful courses at Ellel and been effectively helped. There were many layers, and then I hit 2016 and the Getting to the Roots course. I had already attended the stress and trauma module at Ellel Grange in Dec 2015 - I was amazed how the Lord moved heart pain like bits of tin. Well it was very good but I was too distressed as all this buried stuff came up, and I wasn't as systematic as some people are with the work sheets, but I kept praying and my husband prayed and we just persevered. I asked God for a word and He always gave just the right one for the moment. It did not stop us blessing others and we even had a good holiday with our firstborn and family and other things, but I still did not feel ok as more things from childhood were dug up.
The bottom line was Dad's PTSD and the way he shouted, even though he could be hard working and compassionate. He never told us what happened at Alamein, just my brother was called after the friend he lost. Looking back this ex choirboy raised in a masonic Anglican church and trying to trust Jesus did well, and I am thankful, but the reality is if a man has a bomb blast and then later shouts at a child, the child's heart suffers the same impact. Although I truly believe the Word of the Lord, and God made me competent and not fearful, I could never understand why my heart seemed anxious without reason, especially against people who bullied me unfairly. I am thankful it has been revealed, 4 years on, I am thankful to Alison and other ministries who understand deep trauma. So if anyone else is suffering this, then be encouraged, Jesus is Faithful, He Misses Nothing and He will complete that which he started. As the song goes, Oh NO YOU NEVER GIVE UP. Many do not understand what this is like to have emotions shattered, so it is a very specialist area imhop! Bless you and may God give the increase. I received the gift of prophecy in 1977 because His strength shows in weak people and I am thankful.